Two events occurred which I must outline before I dive further into the crux of this post
- I watched “The Social Network” – a movie that I had procrastinated long enough to watch and also thanks to the persistence of someone who decided it was a shame that I hadn’t watched it yet and rented it out for me (Thank you!)
- During my aimless loitering of the Internets, I noticed that a friend of mine had TYPED the status message “Unavailable”
Remember that scene in the movie when this dude comes to Zuckerberg and asks him what the relationship status of this one girl was and Zuckerberg has some sort of epiphany that leads him to build that feature into Facebook? Well this is nothing like that..then again maybe similar but only in a improvement sort of way. Which brings us to the crux of this post – we need new relationship options in our social media networks.
This is the current list of options available to us when Facebook asks us to publicize our relationship status. You would think, after your first glance, that this list caters to the relationship needs of modern society. But think again it clearly lacks a few basic options which we will get to in a second. The truth is that life and society has changed to a point where the old relationship options are just a subset of those that are actually needed.
And with that I give to you the new options that need to be added to the relationship status list
- Relationship Undefined – This is for times when YOU
knowthink its more than just friends but the other person doesn’t act like it at all. And you struggle for many weeks/months trying to give it some sort of definition “Are we just friends?”, “Are we more than friends?”, “Do you want it to be more than friends” and more importantly no matter how hard you try you just dont get a straight answer for it - Emotionally Unavailable - Usually reserved for those who just came out of a defined relationship and in no state of mind to fall into another. (used in the movie “Friends With Benefits”)
- Temporarily Uninterested - Sometimes everyone just needs some time away from even dealing with other people.
DTF – A tribute to the wildly stupid Jersey Shore
In any case, one thing is for sure – the current list is just way inadequate for the plethora of conditions we seem to find ourselves in. So Zucks, remember how you made money off that epiphany you had in the movie? Here, just add these into the list will ya? Trust me, it’s just way more fun this way!